How to raise confident kids? My tried and tested tips for you!

Have you ever wondered why some kids will speak anything they want while others will hide behind their parent’s legs?

Well, part of it is the situation and their personality of how they cope up with the given condition. But the other part is the way they have been raised.

Yes, it is so important how the child is raised and this comes with practice. And when I say practice, I mean a lot of practice. There are some habits that you need to feed in your kids in order to raise confident and intentional kids.

This article will show you exactly how! Now, these are my favorite steps, you can follow this guide and add or delete things because each child is different and raised differently.

Who are confident kids?

Confident kids are those who try to do things themselves without letting any fear get in their way. When a child is confident, it is shown the way he carries himself. Everything about him shows confidence, the posture, the eye contact, the body language, everything.

Confident children know their worth and values and trust their own capabilities. is this something you want to pass on to your child?

Smart and confident kids playing

It is very important to note that you shouldn’t judge your child for not having confidence sometimes as confidence fluctuates. It’s very likely that a child will be more confident in doing things they have done before and show some reluctance when doing new things.

It’s natural!

It’s your job to build their confidence, support them and coach them!

My 8 Most Effective Strategies to Raise Confident Kids

Every parent wants their child to be confident while speaking and grow up to be a great public speaker. But because of today’s competitive environment, many children face social issues that sadly affect their confidence in the long run.

However, building public speaking skills in kids can become way easier if you identify situations that make them uncomfortable and then help them accordingly.

There are a few tips that can certainly help you in raising smart and confident kids and imbibing public speaking skills in them. Read on!

Practice Role-Play in Conversations

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Role-play games nurture quick-thinking skills and are a great way to boost self-confidence in kids. So think of situations you can act out and encourage your child to speak.

You can try out situations that they may especially be uncomfortable in. For example, you can play the role of a new classmate or their teacher to see how they communicate in school where they spend so much time.

You can also ask your child to enact a different person. This is a great activity to also develop empathy in children because it makes them imagine personal issues their character may be going through and respond to the communication accordingly.

Observe and Improve Their Body Language

Working on their body language is extremely important for building confidence in kids. Some kids have difficulty in picking non-verbal cues which can be a hurdle in developing effective communication skills.

If they get a hold of this unspoken form of communication, they will be more understanding of people’s intentions and emotions.

Explain to them what different expressions mean and how to use the right body language to communicate your thoughts. Teach them how to make eye contact, keep their shoulders back, and stand straight. This is very important to improve public speaking skills for kids.  

Show Kids How to Start Conversations

Most children face problems in starting a conversation. Parents can help them overcome this problem by equipping them with commonly used phrases to make communication.

You can think of situations and suggest some conversation-starters, as well as questions, continue communication with ease.

Ask Them for Their Opinion

Giving them choices and asking them for their opinion plays a great role in building confidence in kids. Just make sure to give them reasonable choices. Involve them in decision-making; you can ask them to compare the pros and cons and communicate why they chose what they chose.

Think of simple things like what color of linen should you pick or which movie to watch on the weekend. Voicing their opinion can be a mega confidence booster for them.

You can also ask them to share their ideas in family discussions or gatherings. Helping them speak in front of two or more people where they have the spotlight can be very helpful in raising confident kids.

Encourage them to Socialize

Giving them exposure in social situations is a great way to improve public speaking skills in kids. Begin with helping them gel with kids of the same age. More importantly, help them spend time with kids with a growth mindset.

According to Dr. Carol Dweck, author of Mindset, humans are born with either a fixed mindset or a growth mindset. What it means is that people with a fixed mindset believe their ability to do something is fixed and they can’t change it.

But, people with growth mindsets believe they have the potential to improve their abilities. You are always learning, developing, and socializing.

As a parent, you should help your child in developing his growth mindset. You can arrange small parties or casually invite their peers over to play.

According to a psychological study, kids who grow up to have poor self-esteem usually have a history of trouble making friends.

But you can fix that by constantly exposing them to social situations and basically giving them the nudge they need to make friends.

Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are a great way to help kids build conversations. So, allow them to speak with the focus on sharing their experience.

For example, instead of asking ‘how was school’, you can ask what they learned today at school and what the highlight of their day was. This way you will leave space for them to share their thoughts.

Let them know having emotions is normal

It’s very important to let your child know he can have emotions as a human. He is allowed to have good and bad days.

It’s not the emotions you need to worry about, teach them what important is how you handle them.

In Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child, Dr. John Gottman gives parents powerful tips for raising a self-aware child. The more a child is self-aware and knows how to control their emotions, the more confident the child.

Emotional awareness means that you recognize your feelings when you have an emotion, know how to deal with it and respect other people’s emotions as well.

Instead of saying, Don’t cry! This is nothing! Don’t be afraid. You will be fine. Be there for your child and explain to him that it’s OK to feel hurt.

Listen empathetically and listen to how they are feeling. All they want from you at that moment is for you to support them.

Don’t try to fix things! You just need to be there when they need you. This will not just boost their self-confidence but will help you create a bond with them and reverse defiance in them.

Let them have age-appropriate chores around the house

I still remember when I didn’t let my kids do a single chore around the house and I could feel they never had a sense of responsibility until I let them do a few.

Even though there are many children around, complaining about having to do chores, this one is worth pushing through and helping them to have a sense of responsibility during their growth process.

According to a Harvard Study, children with a good work ethic are an indicator of success as adults.

It’s important to teach them to be on a constant lookout around the house for ways they can help. Eventually, this will come naturally!

Trust me! Children who help around the house have a sense of pride and they know when they put in effort things can run smoothly. This gives them confidence in their abilities and sets them up to adulthood successfully.

If you’re not sure what chores are age-appropriate for your child, you can find here 35+ age-appropriate chores for your kids. You will get plenty of ideas about what your child can help you out with.

Conclusion – Key-Takeaways

As you can see, there are various actions parents can take to raise confident kids. If you’re intentional, you will definitely help your child to be more confident

So what you must do is:

  • Build a positive attitude in kids.
  • Help them overcome the problem of shyness, especially when talking to strangers. This is very critical in improving public speaking in kids.
  • Help them improve their body language and create stage presence.
  • Help them overcome stage fright.
  • Try out activities used for building confidence in kids.

Most importantly, do things with your child instead of taking tasks over. Make them confident at home so that they can also be confident outside.

These habits will be carried with them into their adulthood. And this is something they will teach their kids in the future. This is how you form a family’s legacy. I hope this article was helpful!

Related Articles:

11 Effective Tips To Reverse Defiance In Kids

How To Make Your Child Listen Without Yelling

4 Simple Ways To Teach Kids To Deal With Peer Pressure

5 Crucial Areas To Build Your Child’s Language

How To Bridge Generation Gap As Parents

The 26 Best Books For Preschoolers In 2021

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The 8 Most Effective Strategies to Raise Confident Kids

Samidha Raj

Samidha Raj works as part of the content marketing team at Planet Spark, a platform that provides online classes to K8 learners on "New Age Skills" like, English Communication, Public Speaking, Grammar, Creative Writing, Debating, etc. She is passionate about empowering the youth by educating parents about the importance of 21st-century skills. In her free time, you can find her watching documentaries or animated movies and organizing game nights (board games are her thing)!